You’re standing at the stove cooking a hot dog for your favourite puppy. As the sausage is a sizzlin’ and a singin’ in the pan, is your only thought, “OMG, is this sausage going to explode and kill us all?” Well, you can sleep soundly tonight knowing that the Stephen Harper Government® is planning to spend “invest” over $800,000 to stop the devastation caused by exploding sausages.
This investment of more than $826,000 will help the company purchase new manufacturing equipment that will produce a higher quality sausage that is more resistant to splitting or bursting while cooking. The company, to its knowledge, will be the first to apply the technology in Canada.
Apparently the following technology is unknown at Agriculture Canada.
Puncturing your sausage twice with this implement will save lives. Won’t you help?
(Why are they called Conservatives? They are anything but when it comes to spending other people’s money.)






I have no words. Really. No words (sigh).